A half-full-of-champagne glass

I’m sure you already heard the expression “glass half full or half empty”! It’s normally used to identify positive and negative people in a kind of plastic, selective process memorized answer type: “Oh! Me? I’m a ‘half full glass’ type of girl; always positive about everything!”.

Argh, let’s be honest! The glass is half way and that’s it! The difference is only on how you look at it; and this is a matter of choice.

Sometimes I choose that the glass is half empty and I react accordingly. Sometimes I choose that the glass is half full and I have another reaction. And, sometimes I choose it’s a flute glass; full of champagne and that, changes the way I face my day. The fact is that if I choose even how I perceive and react about something, even more all the rest.

Deep down, to choose is to pick a road and go! Therefore, it is mine the choice to be kind; it is mine the choice to be present; it is mine the choice to enjoy; it is mine the choice to cease my now; it is mine the choice to make my now better! Etc! Etc! Etc! 

Choice is essential! Without it, it’s impossible to get hold of anything. Without choice we lose the right to responsible and accept consequences. Maybe this is interesting when results are negative (who never had a scapegoat is either an only child or a saint and throw the stone); but what about when they are positive?

Yes, I know it isn’t easy to choose! And, I confess I have been choosing badly in some moments! For example, I’ve been choosing to complain too much about my life and waiting periods, even knowing they are  temporary and a result of conscious and extremely happy choices I've made recently! I also have been choosing to procrastinate (also called lazyness, but the other way looks prettier) and to postpone good results for me. I chose to stop my Kung Fu classes for over a year, even knowing they are essential to my sanity and incredibly good for my body.

But the beauty of choice it’s in the freedom it allow us. When I’m responsible, I’m also free and I can choose again if for any reason I screwed up last time.

Today you can choose to join me! You don’t need to write a blog or do a ceremony to make your participation official; all you need is to choose to act; now!

Carpe Diem: Tempus Fugit...

"Whenever there are alternatives, be careful. Do not choose the convenient, the comfortable, the respectable, the socially acceptable, the honourable. Choose what makes your heart vibrates. Choose what you would like to do, despite all consequences." (Osho)

The quote by Osho may seem strange, polemic, according to the way you read it. But, to me, it talks about presence. This ability to be whole where you are; and to be happy, vibrating because of it. Consequences in this case are normally positive!

No life lover is happy if not complete where he/she is. Enjoying that unique moment, knowing it will go away. Carpe Diem: Tempus Fugit! Cease the day, time perishes!

Easily said, hardly done! I've travelled wanting to stay home; went to church wanting to be at that BBQ with friends; stayed late at work, wanting to see that friend I hadn't met for such a while... Not there, nor here! I chose because I thought it was convenient, comfortable, respectable, socially acceptable, honourable, "right"; and most of the time I blamed someone for the lack of honesty with myself. To be there wasn't what I really wanted. Body in a place; minda nd heart in another. I went by the moment but didn't enter in it, didn't live! What was the fun of it?

This lack of presence doesn't happen only when I get divided after a choice. Right now, while I write this text, I stopped many time to get things ready to sleep, while my mind thought about many things. As a result I had to correct the text many times. I didn't write it whole; nor enjoyed the time to get ready for a nice sleep.

On the other hand, my best memories are those in which I can go back in time and feel what I felt; being the memory so physical! The connection with someone dear in the silence after laughter; a divine revelation sat in the grass; the pleasure tiredness of a dancing  body in and unforgettable party; childhood tastes of yummy things only grannies can manage to cook; and so many other. Moments in which I was present. As when we hug someone we like so much and years later, when remembering it, we feel the heart hugging again and our lips open in a smile.

However the point of presence is not to become neurotic or with a heavy consciousness! A 100% presence is for the illuminated (maybe we'll get there eventually) only! And, to drop the work to go to the movies 'cause your heart told you so, isn't fair play! Presence should be practiced! It means to enjoy where you are without stress or pressure. Doing your work with the most passion and attention possible and than, go to the movies! It is to cease every second of the film because you don't need to be worried about your boss looking for you or about that report with a deadline in the next couple of days you haven't even started.

Presence is to enjoy a dish experiencing every bite, every flavour, texture, temperature; instead of swallowing it down. To sit in the sofa to read a book and feel the softness of the fabric against your body, your fingers going through the pages, the story getting into your mind and playing with your heart. It is to be with friends with no rush, without thinking about the dishes you'll have to wash after dinner, to listen to what they are saying behind blue eyes or smiles. It is also to follow the rhythm of life; wake up with the spring; get lighter with the summer; slow down at Fall; reflect during winter. 

Presence is part of this blog because without it is impossible to write anything with content. It is part of life because without it is impossible to live "now". 

Kindness: a simple concept and a huge challenge

I'm not the only one to think that being kind is nice!

Everybody I know likes when someone stops to let you in first on traffic or holds you the lift door! We are surprised and love when people are kind; and constantly complain about the lack of education, sense, citizenship, etc.

Anyway, in theory the concept is simple and beautiful.

In practice, I've also pretended to be asleep in the tube not to loose my place (after all what doesn't hurt... isn't my responsibility, right?). When is much more common and easy to push who is in front of you than step aside and wait for the next train; being kind becomes a constant challenge.

The concept-challenge: Kindness is a voluntary and altruistic choice

This means that give the place in the line for someone over 60 is not kindness, it's citizenship. Stop the car on a unsigned crossing line isn't kindness, it's obligation  (by law in most Countries). To hold that handsome man's bag isn't kindness, is mild flirtation. And so on! It doesn't lower you kindness score but it also doesn't add points to it!

The idea here is to be kind just because; because you can, because it makes you moment nicer and happier, and maybe someone else's too.

Acting in 03 levels

- Me. Being kind to us is the first step! Therefore I intend to ignore, for example, what those neurotic inner voices telling me about this blog and how silly it and I are!

- The others. It's valid to be kind to your mom, dad, siblings, friends, neighbors, dog, cat, and parrot. What isn't allowed is to smile to the stranger at the café and kick who are closer to "balance".

- The World. To be kind breaks paradigms. Think, as women, to open the doors to the boys just out of kindness says more about equality than 1.000.000 burned bras! Same way, to reduce your waste is to be kind with the planet!

Kindness demands common sense

Kindly, do not exaggerate! Deep down, it isn't necessary to be a super hero to be kind! o need to run to open the door first! No need to always say yes and promise things you'll regret, just to be kind with a friend! And, definitely, don't by a 5.000 pounds purse just to be nice with yourself!

In fact, to be nice is simple! All that is needed is will and attention.

From where do we start?

From the beginning... the first step... the first text... the decision together with the action... from anywhere! What is most important is to begin!  

This blog is an invitation I made myself to start something real to change what I believe isn't fine: NOW, RIGHT AWAY, IMMEDIATELY! I'd like to forward this invitation to you! 

It's simple! It mix things I discovered about me, to things I'd like to see happening and an idea!

Things I discovered about me

- I'm impatient; I want things to happen right now!

- I adore life; think it's a gift and that I should enjoy it to the most!

- I'm not an island; what I do impact other people and the World and vice-versa!

- I have a choice!

Things I'd like to see happening 

- a happier World!

- people becoming more conscious, whole, free and happy!
- people complaining less and doing more!

The idea

- To live a better now!

How?

Applying simple concepts to concrete actions: being kinder, making better choices, being more present, being more patient, smiling more often, acting lighter, sharing good things, questioning things that doesn't make sense etc. All to improve myself and possibly affect people and the world; so that my "right now" is better and I become happier (yes, the proposal is totally egoistic after all)!

Here is the invitation! I believe a better now starts with me; how about you?